It can be very confusing if you are looking for some help with your marital problems. There is traditional weekly therapy as well as intensive therapy which could be a marriage retreat, seminar or workshop. There are pastoral counselors, social workers, and mental health counselors that offer couples therapy as well. Some therapists are licensed and others are not. There are workshops, seminars, and retreats. Here, couples get away for a few days, take a break from their ordinary life of family and work, in order to focus exclusively on themselves and their marital challenges and goals.
In order to clear up some of the confusion, this article will go over the main differences between a marriage seminar and a marriage retreat and when each type is the more appropriate option.
What Is A Marriage Seminar?
A marriage seminar or workshop is usually a group program, often run by a church or other religious organization. Typically, the aim is to teach a group of couples basic communication skills as well as talk about their religious perspective on marriage. Often, they will cover some of the warning signs of common marital challenges and explore useful suggestions on how to make your marriage happier and more successful.
It is a great way for couples dealing with mild issues to get a simple tune up and to learn some healthy skills. Hopefully, this will prevent bigger problems in the future. It is perfect for newlyweds and for engaged couples preparing for married life.
It is usually a combination of lectures from a professional therapist, teacher, or clergy member along with videos and experiential exercises for the couples who attend to learn these skills. Often couples leave with handouts that reinforce the information presented at the seminar.
What Is A Marriage Retreat?
Marriage retreats come under several different names, such as: Intensive Marriage Retreat, Couples Intensive Retreat, or Private Couples Retreat. They all are best for couples who are dealing with bigger issues, not just skill building and prevention techniques. Intensive retreats get results in a few days while many couples struggle in therapy for years without achieving their goals.
A good marriage retreat should teach skills that will help in intimate relationships as well as in parenting and friendships. In addition to skill building exercises, a marriage retreat should help the couple solve specific issues and help them work through challenging times.
When To Attend A Marriage Retreat
After An Affair
Many couples who attend a marriage retreat fixate on specific conversations or events that have been troubling them over the years. At Marriage Quest, we often work with a couple dealing with infidelity. These couples are usually wondering if they are incompatible or if too much damage has been done.
Often when we dig in, we discover that they are in fact very compatible. This is especially true if they had good physical attraction in the very beginning of their relationship. The problem is that they haven’t learned good relationship skills. Also, many people carry old wounds from childhood or other past intimate relationships. Once we help them learn the roots of their hypersensitivity and defensiveness, they are on the way to a better marriage.
For Discernment Counseling
Many couples who choose to attend a retreat are on the edge of a divorce, with at least one person having a foot out the door. This desire to divorce can surface after an affair, from falling in love with someone else, or from years of disconnection and suffering.
Discernment counseling deals with the decision to divorce or not. This is where the couple talks about what happened and why. They explore the pros and cons of a divorce. Since 40-80 percent of people who get a divorce will regret that decision in the future, it is wise to have a professional therapist guide you through that decision process and spend a fair amount of time exploring options.
The good news about having open and honest discussions about the reality of a divorce is that, when done well, many couples change their minds. They often decide to work on the marriage instead of rushing into a divorce. This is often a last-ditch effort and now becomes what they call their “Hail Mary”.
When Struggling With A Sexless Marriage Or Midlife Crisis
It’s common for couples to struggle in a sexless marriage or with a midlife crisis. Both of these issues affect the emotional bonds and open communication that are hallmarks of a healthy marriage. Marriage retreats can provide greatly needed assistance in navigating difficult conversations about sensitive topics. Many couples who attended Marriage Quest retreats report that getting professional support allowed them to revive and strengthen their relationships. We firmly believe that most marriages can survive difficulties and even be brought back from the brink of a breakup.
Marriage Quest Marriage Retreats
At Marriage Quest, our retreats are specifically designed to serve each couple’s needs. Within a matter of a few days, couples tackle relationship issues, set new goals and learn important communication strategies. We have helped thousands of couples find their way back to healthy, happy, and fulfilling relationships. Schedule a free consultation today by clicking the button below.
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