Build Stronger Communication Skills Through A Marriage Retreat
Communication therapy is one of the foundational pillars of a Marriage Quest Retreat, and it works. The reason it works is because we are going to stop the conversation and redirect you when the fighting or avoidance starts. This process allows us to quickly identify the negative cycles and triggers that cause poor communication, but then more importantly it allows us to coach you on how to talk to each other in a manner that rebuilds trust, creates good habits, and nurtures a healthy marital team so that you can continue to apply these skills long after the retreat ends.
Create Good Habits
Many couples looking for communication therapy need to break old habits. You will get better at what you practice, which means that most couples who contact us for support are masters at arguing together or avoiding conversations.
The only way you are going to have effective conversations with your spouse is to practice good communication with each other, thereby improving your ability to connect with each other in more positive ways. During the retreat, we are going to observe, coach, and redirect the conversation to help you form good habits.
After your retreat we will suggest that you have regular conversations together; some should be deep and meaningful to clear the air and connect better and some should be fun conversations to keep the spark of playfulness alive.
Many couples who attend a Marriage Quest Retreat are dealing with a break in trust either from an affair, past gaslighting, or other breakdowns in the relationship. Effective communication should help both partners feel heard and validated so they can become vulnerable with each other and trust that the other person is safe and will take care of them.
Extreme stressful emotions or beliefs that came into your life during a childhood trauma like bullying or into your adult life like finding out about an affair, was all there to protect you. These “parts” of your inner self need to talk to each other at some point. They need to learn to adapt and to serve you in a positive way by mediating the parts.
Richard Schwartz, developer of Internal Family Systems, talks about the 8C’s: courage, connectedness, creativity, compassion, clarity, calm, curious, and confident. We have found the 8 C’s helpful in rebuilding trust in one’s self and in the marriage.
Marital Team Building
During your retreat, we are your lifeline. We are going to hold you accountable, provide direction and insight, and teach you how to have an effective conversation. We will teach you how successful couples negotiate challenging conversations as well as how to negotiate problem solving for big issues. Before the retreat ends, we are going to instruct you and your partner in how to be a team and support each other in continuing to grow and apply these skills after leaving us. Learning how to coach your partner is essential for long term success.